Ig Pay Atin Lay East Bay  LbNA # 19144 (ARCHIVED)

Placed DateNov 6 2005
LocationEmeryville, CA
Planted Bylisascenic    
Found By Anna and the kids
Last Found Nov 20 2005
Hike Distance?

Ig Pay Atin Lay East Bay

Emeryville is tearing up their shoreline, and this box is missing as of January 1, 2006. I plan to re-plant, so stay tuned!

Why don’t San Franciscans come over the East Bay? I’ve heard people joking that they’re afraid of our beautiful sunny weather and cheaper rents, but really I think it is a throwback to the times when we expressed our deepest, most secret thoughts in Pig Latin. Some things were too sacred to express any other way, and when we hear Pig Latin, we understand the importance of the thought being expressed.

I think San Franciscans fear the army of gigantic mechanical Trojan horses that are lined up by the Bay Bridge. They fear the horse. They fear the EAST BAY.

(Say that last sentence in your best drawn-out horror movie voice. “They fear the E-E-E-E-EAST BA-A-A-A-A-AY…”)

To find the East Bay Etterbox Lay, you’ll need to begin your search on Powell Street in Emeryville, west of 80. Drive west, passing Udflats May on your left. You’ll pass the namesake of an Andal Scay on your right. Pass a great place to get a famous Ocktail Cay, and then the yacht harbor on your right. You can park in the public parking at this point. Walk to the water, and face those fearsome horsies. They’re big, mechanical and spo-o-o-o-o-o-oky! Now locate a building that serves as roost for a duo of fearsome creatures. Follow the path behind this golden roost, and perhaps you’ll see some not-so-scary feral Itties Kay. Whew! Facing so many frightful creatures must be exhausting! Why not sit down? You’ve rounded the corner of the golden roost and passed one bench, but this second bench looks pretty inviting… You can see San Francisco from here. It looks safe. Your visit to the East Bay may not have put the city in peril, after all…

Your bench really is nice and secluded. Hey, what’s that under the bush to your right? Better be careful that any fishermen don’t see what you’re investigating. They might be Eyes Spay.