Napoleon Dynamite  LbNA # 26103

Ownerthe golden seven    
Placed DateOct 5 2006
LocationFairfax, VA
Found By Night0wl
Last Found Aug 27 2013
Hike Distance?

Napoleon Dynamite Boxes #1, #2, & #3

Locations: Box #1 Briarwood Park
Box #2 Hideaway Park (on Glenvale Rd.)
Box #3 Villa Lee Park (intersection of Glenvale & Hunter Rd, near Rt. 29)

Distance: About a 2 mile round trip walk through a quiet neighborhood, mostly on sidewalks or a slightly longer car drive.

Napoleon Dynamite #1—“Vote for me and all your wildest dreams will come true.”

Location: Briarwood Park (too new to be found on most maps,
but VERY EASY to find)

Directions to park: From 66 take Nutley Street South exit. At FIRST light turn LEFT on to Swanee (the other direction will take you to the south entrance of the Vienna Metro). IMMEDIATELY go left (before any houses) on to Zimpel. This road goes along Nutley St. to the wall of 66 then it curves sharply right. The road will dead-end into the parking area of Briarwood Park. This is where your wildest dreams will come true!

Enter the park by taking the paved path up past the basketball courts…” How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a football over them {barrier walls}? Yeah. Coach woulda put me in fourth quarter, we would've been state champions. No doubt. No doubt in my mind.” past the playground. Enter the place where you might hear “Tina, come get some DINN
ER!... Tina, eat. Food. Eat the FOOD!” and go to the back, left corner post. Look down you will see a small path. Follow the path straight to the large tree. Just beyond that tree about 5-6 paces slightly right is another tall straight oak tree. Look at the base of that tree in the back, under a tot, oops I meant root. “Luck-eeeeee!” (This one has had please replace this one especially carefully).

To continue on to Napoleon Dynamite #2—“ It took me like three hours to finish the shading on your upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done” proceed to Hideaway Park.

If you are walking then return to the grassy trail and keep walking past the pavilion. The path will curve right and you will see a sidewalk ahead. Follow the sidewalk staying left towards the stop sign. You are now on Hideaway Rd. Follow Hideaway straight through the stop sign to the next left. Go left on to Glenvale. Follow Glenvale to Hideaway Park on the right. “ Hey! Will you do me a favor …? Can you bring me my chapstick? My lips hurt real bad!”

If you are driving, then go back down the path and return to your car. Go back along Zimpel to Swanee. You will turn right onto Swanee, but you will need to get in the left lane to turn left on to Nutley St. Turn left at the first stoplight onto Hermosa. Go to the stop sign and turn left on to Beau Lane. Make a quick right on to Suteki. At the stop sign turn right onto Hideaway and then make the first left onto Glenvale. Follow Glenvale to Hideaway Park on your right. Park on the street near the brown park signs.

“Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?”
” I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!” But you're not in Alaska now so you won't find any wolverines here, but you could practice your Rex Kwan Do moves! "At Rex Kwan Do, we use the buddy system. No more flying solo... Second off, you're gonna learn to discipline your image. You think I got where I am today because I dressed like Peter Pan over here?"

To find Napoleon Dynamite #2 (aka “Pretty much my best drawing ever”) starting at the brown park sign proceed up the wide path to the basketball court. Walk to the center of the court facing the tree at opposite end of court from hoop. Look 45° and spot two large tall straight twin trees. Walk to the back side of those two trees about 20 paces from the side of the court. Look under the rock at the base of the tree (not the large hole). Enjoy the liger, “It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic.” Please replace the rock when you’re done. “Sweet!”

For Napoleon Dynamite #3, use your “sweet skills” and proceed to Villa Lee Park. This is a short walk from Hideaway Park. Go back to the brown park sign and go down the large hill. If you drive, park your car just before the stop sign on Glenvale. At the stop sign look straight ahead across Hunter Rd. you will see a very small brown park sign (no name is listed) and a path into the woods.

Enter the park on the gravel path. Proceed to the wooden bridge over the bubbling brook where “I caught you a delicious bass”. Just after crossing the bridge, take one step off “Whoa! You got like three feet of air that time dude!” and then STOP. Look left at the base of the bridge. Napoleon Dynamite #3 is found just under the bridge in between the cinderblock and metal railing. Please replace rock after enjoying box #3 (Napoleon’s self-portrait.) Now you can celebrate by just making “yourself a … quesa-dilluh!” with some 1% milk and of course watching "Napoleon Dynamite" so you get all of the goofy quotes!

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