Catnip and his cousin, Tux, were Knights of the Road. Catnip was an orange tabby with emerald green eyes, andTux always looked like he was wearing a tuxedo, so they called him ‘Tux’. Tanasi was their last name.
Okay, so these two cats were strolling down Island Home Avenue in south Knoxville one day and they were getting pretty hungry. Old lady Hassell didn’t put out her usual dish of leftovers that day, so the two were on the prowl for something to eat!
As they came around the corner, as luck would have it, they ran into a sign that read like the name of a popular pet food. "This must be where they make catfood!”, said Tux. “After you, monsieur; bon appetite!”, said Catnip. So with that, they entered the premises.
Spying a big blue box to the west right off, Catnip said, “I’m getting good vibes right off the bat, Catnip. BFI - must mean, Beef and Fish for the Indigent. I can smell some ripe tuna fish right now! And look, there is a telephone number we can call if we want more!”, so they picked up their pace following their noses.
As they approached the box, a 52 pound raccoon bounded out of the bin, burped, bared his teeth, and stood up bare-naked on his back bow-legs. The two weenie Knights quickly looked at one another and with arched tails took off around the curve not stopping until they arrived at the kiosk.
Breathing hard, they looked at a map and saw a sinkhole and agreed it would be just the place to head towards because it would be downhill and they needed a rest. Off they pranced in the direction of the sink.
At a Southern Magnolia, they headed east, stopping to quench their thirst at the seasonal emerald pool. Whilst there, they each dispatched a slow frog to assuage their hunger.
Continuing, Tux remarked, “What Are These Weeds Doing Here?” Catnip, feeling a little frisky, laughed, “I dunno, Tux, but there must be some Catnip around here, 'cuz my sinuses are closing up! I gotta get out of here!” So, they took off at 40 degrees or so and headed into the woods when all of a sudden Tux recognized the cat scratches of his 'Uncle 'Kitty' Tanasi (at least that’s what his human friends kept calling him). “I know where I am now.” he said, “It’ll be dark soon and we can spend the night at Uncle Kitty’s place.”
As they progressed, they passed through a small field of sleeping giants. One of the large ones, shaped like a tuning fork, pointed left in the direction they needed to go. As they rounded the rails, they paused and sat on the inside steps for a moment to thank God for the beauty they had seen and for keeping them safe on their journey.
They continued on to the 9th Post Street intersection where Aunt Boots lived. “Its only 160 steps now to the turn-off to my Uncle’s place”, Tux said smiling. (Editor’s note: These would be kitty steps, of course). Reaching the turn-off, they took off at 120 degrees downhill leaping from step to step.
At the "T" they looked off to see 8 parallels and Tux knew they had arrived at Uncle Kitty’s place. But all that remained was an old log bench, as unbeknownst to Tux, his uncle had passed away last summer – a victim of heat stroke from global warming. It was night now, and all they could do was to sleep on the little old bench.
As the years went on, nobody knew what happened to ol' Tux. Some say he was adopted by old Lady Hassell. Others say he was picked up by ol' man Koon whose wife loved cats. Tux was last seen plucking a Goldfinch out of mid air - a marvelous feat to see, although deadly to the pretty little Goldfinch. Still another rumor was that he was run over by mean old Mr. Wood who was known to hate cats.
Catnip went on to start the LBSe Seed Company. He was so taken with the beauty of what he had seen that night on Uncle Kitty's little old bench, that he asked to be buried there; and so he wuz. His memorial was made by 'T.E.A.M. Bear Cat' of the famous letterboxing bear cats in Nashville, TN, and can be found here today under a nice stone memorial behind a post with 2 pointers each pointing to 250 degrees.
As usual, there is a substantial first finders prize (provided for by Catnip in his will) and a nice certificate. Also, in honor of these fish loving cats, a virtual "Seafood Platter" of boxes has been created for your enjoyment.
Please be careful on the trails, and drive around to the modern visitor center for clean restrooms, water, and maybe buy a $1.00 trail map. You'll be glad you did.
Assuming you will be re-hiding this box, be sure to "fluff-up' everything real nice so all appears pristine once again.
Your thoughts about finding this box are most appreciated, and will be passed on to Catnip's descendants.