Wisconsin Zombie Alert!  LbNA # 59966 (ARCHIVED)

OwnerMartini Man      
Placed DateOct 30 2011
Location???????, ???????, WI
Found ByThe "Sneak"-ers (Attempted)
Last UpdateMay 1 2015
Hike Distance?

30 - 45 minutes
Short hike, some uphill.

All units! Be advised there was a major outbreak of zombies in Maine last weekend and we have it on good authority that two Wisconsin natives were in the area and may have brought the infection back with them! Helicopter and special tracking units, compete with zombie-sniffing dogs have been tracking their movements and we need all responding patrols to converge on the following location. Because we do not know if the infection made these people smart or stupid zombies, we are scrambling the locale so they cannot tell if we know where they are. The location is dnalerutan krap near dnomhcir and the best place to pick up the trail is at the westernmost parking lot.

Responding trackers (before we lost communication with them mysteriously) indicated that the two were doing an eerily familiar shamble associated with zombies up a trail of many terrains. Satellite photos saw them cross a bridge and turn left at what appears to be a 14 sign (at least from what we can figure out with high resolution) along a boardwalk and then north at what we think is an 11. The trail has a major upward slant and at its crest, near what might be a root snake and near a “Y’ tree, we lost contact with the male half of the duo. A last radio communique we had with a tracker (before we lost touch amid a blood-curdling scream) was that he took off at 340 degrees for about 35 steps and then disappeared near a hollowed-out tree.

We were still able to maintain visual contact with the female half as she shuffled down and around the bend of the trail. Last validated contact was at a bench near an 8. What we think may have happened is that she is secreted in a log behind a log at its base.

All responding units need to exercise EXTREME caution and must be prepared to shoot to kill. Obey the rules of Zombieland and always aim high. If you have to retreat, we suggest doing that quickly as these creatures can move very fast when motivated to eat brains. The best path out from the aforementioned bench is to head on a southeastern heading to the lake and bear right through a number of pines. At the number 7 turn left and, after a brief walk on a boardwalk, you should reach your vehicle.

Good luck and protect Wisconsin from zombies!